-- interracial dating & personals
Interracial dating & personals for black and white singles Chat Search For A Love Match Contact Check Mailbox Discussion Forums Help/FAQS
Hello guest Welcome to - The Interracial Dating Community! Ready to sign up?
scottfreee Francine05 PoeticOne gatechfellow handymann1 pwislee

Add Comment   |   No comments posted  |   More Blog Titles
Interracial Dating -- Black women Dating White Men
Monday, July 24, 2006
Blog Index
go White women Black men
go Black women White men
go Dating Tips & Advice
go Sex & Relationships
go Shades of Gray
go The M&M; Story
go Race In America
I have to admit that when I see an obviously attractive young Black woman in the company of a White man who is not necessarily what you would call good looking, I am guilty of wondering the same question I am sure other people wonder when they see me in the company of an older white male: how desperate for a White man can she be?

It just so happens that I am attracted to older men. I have actually only once or twice been with a man who wasn't at least 10 years older than myself. And I have never been with an exceptionally good looking man, Black or White, primarily because I've never really personally met any man I thought was exceptionally good looking. The physical qualities that usually attract my attention, before any words get exchanged have nothing to do with the man's race. Unlike some Black women who claim to only be attracted to White men, I can find a man physically attractive whether he is Black, White, Asian, Hispanic, Indian or other; but a man has to move me beyond mere physical interest.

I am the type of woman that men find attractive until they try to have a conversation with me. Then, most men don't know how to handle me. I'm too different from what they expect, whether they are Black or White or whatever. Because I am a Black woman I am expected to have a certain way of speaking and conducting myself, so when the average Black man strikes up a conversation with me, as soon as I speak my first word he is put off by the absence of the 'sista' attitude he expects. The same is true for those White men who are interested in a stereotype. They can't identify with a Black woman unless she has that thing that makes Black women "Black" in the eyes of society, the way of speaking, the mannerisms, the 'flava'.

So it has never been easy for me to make connections with men. Generally it has been older men who are more worldy, more experienced, and more intellectual who have taken the time to get to know me. So when I am out in public with a man very likely he will be obviously older, and when he's White on top of being older, it can seem to people to be a curious match--a younger, attractive Black woman with an older not necessarily attractive White man. More often than not people conclude that I am with the man because I was so desperate for a White man that I any old White man who gave me the time of day. I myself have drawn that conclusion upon seeing younger, attractive Black women in public with older White men.

But in reality, the Black woman who does not act the way Black women are stereotyped to act is very often rejected by the stereotypical Black male as well as the Black male who, like she, defies the stereotypical image of Black people. While some do, it is not all Black women dating white men who consciously go out seeking White men. Many are just women who happen to have no restrictions in place when it comes to dating, meaning they don't consider any race of man to be someone they can't date because he's not Black. So when they are approached by a non-Black male, if they are interested in the individual they explore the possibilities the same way they would explore it with a Black man if a Black man bothered to try to get to know them.

Copyright ©
All rights reserved
Add Comment   |   No comments posted  |   More Blog Titles
Lost password?  
An Edgewater Productions creation